The Fight With My Husband

I am often confronted by people who want to understand how the Tarot works. I have my theories... but like with a lot of things in my life, I have a very Agnostic view.... I don't really have to know HOW Tarot works in order to receive its gifts.

Since our move, I have not had a lot of time to play with my cards for my daily work. So this morning I decided before getting out of bed to draw a spread. And here it is.

Wheel of the Year Tarot

I apologize for the shaughty pictures...

Anyways... so the first card that came up the Three of Wands... All this excitement as of late has kind of rendered me in a "Now What" funk... Crossing me was the Seven of Cups... telling me, well it's up to you.... pick wisely.

The Queen of Pentacles reflects that I am now at home within and without and that is what is going on in my physical world. In my head though, I am having a hard time grasping and integrating this in my life with the Page of Pentacles. My recent past shows that we have been feeling very fortunate in regards to our finances. The Hope card is affecting me... also helping me transition and integrate all this new-ness in my life.

The whole situation is Justice. The Thoth deck calls this card "Adjustment" which lately I have been liking. Adjusting adjusting adjusting... it's hard to remain flexible when life corrects itself for you... and you have no clue what is going on.

My hopes and fears has the Four of Pentacles.... yup here it is... that lurking doubt... is it enough? Are we going to be okay? The near future has the Seven of Swords... showing me that we are in the process of getting to that better place.

When I read for myself I pull one card at a time and look at it... so IMAGINE my shock when I pulled the TOWER in my final outcome.

WHAT! Are you kidding me?!

It is at this exact point when reading when you want to start doubting and questioning the cards. You just don't want to believe it.

So I decided to ask the cards what this Tower will look like... then I drew The Wheel and the 8 of Swords.

Great. Awesome. Whatever it is... the cards are telling me not to freak out and stay centered in order to ride through it.

FUCK!

Seriously!!! I cant take any more of this....

So I put the cards away..... and grabbed my new Mary-El Tarot. To which I drew one card.

The Emperor 



Beautiful Isn't it. There are so many ways to interpret the cards... really the only true way to understand their message is to give it time to blossom in your life and see happens.

Sure enough... within the hour my husband and I got into a fight. The stress from moving, financial worries, his foot being broken, him being home, us being up each other's asses... the whole nine yards. Full blown misery.

Well there it is... the Emperor, the Tower, The Five of Pentacles it was all there...

Halfway through our argument I drew another spread. (Don't judge me I always have cards in my hands... and my husband doesn't even bat an eye)

So here it was. I always have a running conversation with my cards.

So here I was... being the Fool. Detached... trying hard to ride out the wave. Crossing me, naturally, the Lovers... go figure. The Devil pops us in what I am dealing with in my physical life. Fear, Doubt, Restriction... oh yeah I was.

But the Empress was affecting me. This card was telling me to choose love.

Of course the Ace of Pentacles saying... hey this is all new... this Ace and this Fool. But the environment has the Strength card. Telling me that if I can use my Strength and Knowledge I can focus on being the Queen of Swords... master of my thoughts. She is honest, forthright, and experienced. She does not let thoughts run away with her... she has controlled them.

The Tower was on my mind.... see it? Above me? All I could think about was... this is it... this is what the cards were talking about. Phew... thank God that the Ten of Swords is in the near future... this argument will come to a dead end. It will go back to where it came from....

The final outcome is the Knight of Cups, which to me, is welcomed after this mess. To get further info on this card I drew another... Judgement.

This tells me that this will end and we will be in a better mindset from now on.

We settled the argument and all was well in the world again. All I could think about were the cards. Sometimes I wonder if people really understand how I use the cards, and how they talk to me. Do they think I am crazy? Do they think I am a new-age weirdo? All I can say... is I have a Gypsy soul... and the cards found me.

Now that the fight is behind us... I drew one last spread....

Looks like the energy is moving around. If you notice, the Seven of Swords was in the near future in my first draw. So here I am... that near future is now. Justice, crossing me, shows that the adjustment is the issue. Do I change from this fight? To I make the necessary adjustments now? Will I balance what needs to be balanced?

The Emperor... on my mind... of course my husband. The Lovers in the environment. The recent past Eight of Cups... which in this deck shows a woman crying over her lover walking away. 

The High Priestess is affecting me. All this knowledge and understanding that I am soaking in from this whole experience. My hopes and fears is the Hanged Man. Yes. I do. I just want to surrender my life over to everything I do not understand. I want to take a break... because I cant control anything... nothing makes sense... everything is, as the Fool says, up in the air.

The near future is the 4 of Wands... and in this deck it shows a man who completed a tree house for his daughter who is jumping for joy. After the fight this morning I am so happy to see this card. As I am typing this my hubby is in the other room watching movies with my kids.

The Final outcome was the Wheel again... We were able to get through this bump and now life goes on... and on and on.... To draw more from this outcome I drew another card... the King of Wands....

I'll take it.

I Got My Mary-El Tarot!!!

Well I have it, my Mary-El Tarot. I LOVE the packaging. It really just creates the set when sitting down with it. No candle lighting or inense bullshit with this... just taking it out of the box is enough to flip my magical switch!

Absolutely beautiful. I love Schiffer publishing... I actually think it may be my favorite publisher. I love the quality and thickness of the cards, very durable... and they truly support the eye and art of the artist.

I took my time to read throught he introduction... which read:

"Memento mori was a genre of art, popular in the Middle Ages, that focused on death, corpses, angels, skeletons, etc., with the purpose of reminding one of their mortality, which is what memento mori means, Remember your Mortality."

This sent a wave of gratitude through me. In one of my previous lives when I was a floral designer I worked with a girl who was a energy healer from Russia. She was an amazing woman. Her and her husband were trained in martial arts, energy healing, aromatherapy, and fitness. When I was younger I thought they were amazing. She taught me how to meditate and feel energy and makes orbs in your hands. She had several healing techniques she used. Her husband, always reminded me of the Magician in Tarot. He was a wonderful creator.

Recently, I met back up with them for lunch in the park. There I gave them Tarot readings. Her husband, older now after having a child who is now six, looked at me and said, "I used to think I was God, but since my grandmother died, things have changed"... to which I replied, "ah yes, Mortality."

This Skull explains how we are Earth (Agate), Spirit (Amethyst), and Human (Skull)

Whenever I receive a new deck, I first ask the deck what it is I can prepare myself to learn when working with the deck. This deck answered me with the Judgement Card.



"In the traditional Judgement card, an angel calls forth the dead from their graves on Judgement Day. The angel is Metatron. The people rising from their graves a...re the worm in the Earth, the crustacean rising from the black water, the Lotus from the muddy bottom of the pond, the life from void, the baby from the womb, the snakes from the black earthen tomb of Malkuth, physical world of life and death, Knowledge, to which we were condemned when we (symbolically) ate the apple, called to meet our destiny."

This was an interesting message to hear since I was in a conversation on my page earlier this morning.

Click This To Be Directed To The Conversation On My Page

So far, I can say, that this deck has a lot of information for me.

I am really excited to learn more about it.

Playdate with My Cards

Life has been good hasn't it? Look at all these Cup cards in the passing. Moving into this new house has been just a blessing.

I mean, LOOK at these faces~!

Love love love. Happy home. So of course it came as a shock to me when I see the 4 of Cups in my head and the Five of Swords covering me! As always, the Tarot knows. I have this little light in me to get going with my cards and create.  I want this firm foundation with the Ten of Pentacles. Its all about work. Yes I feel a little defeated. Yes I feel a little disheartened about it all. I need to make some changes in that area. The Lovers card says... Love is a choice. I it possible to be afraid of too much goodness? Yes... believe it or not. I love the Six of Wands. I love this card. Funny I pulled the 8 of Pentacles for the end. I casted this spread this morning and since then I had to do an email reading.

There is so much information here in this one spread. Usually I cast spreads to look at what my energy looks like, or to get a better picture of an issue... or even to route possibilities and see the outcomes to help make decisions. Sometimes I just like to shuffle and look at them. I love Tarot so much sometimes I just look at the decks... in their boxes... I just stare at them. But then I wonder... why the hell did I ever come across these things!!! Love is quite strange. Love can consume you like a heroin addict and ensnare you. That's when it becomes an addiction. But where is the line? What makes the difference. Im starting to think it is a matter of give and take. If someone in the relationship is not in balance is what makes the difference. As of late, I feel like the Tarot has not been giving back. What am I suppose to do with this? Okay I can read cards. Now what. I suppose I could spend the rest of my life playing with these for my own amusement and betterment and be happy. But that's not it. Not sure what it is just yet thought.

I will ask my Shapeshifter deck. What do you have to say about what is coming up?

Lost Magick, Atonement, Re-Balance.

"It is, I say, time to be softer, to say sorry. To acknowledge unfortunate words and harsh behavior and apologise-and then forgive yourself. Something sad has happened, the landscape around you is bereft, empty. It is sad, and you feel lonely and somehow like the world is a void. The harvest has come and gone, and it feels you have been left with nothing- and someone has been hurt. You do feel very sad, and like you have been most unjustly treated. It is time to plant new seeds in this abandoned and lonely landscape. There will be new growth. All will be well again. But it may take an acknowledgement on your part in this sad tale to understand fully how to bring life back to richness and beauty"

Damn.

Dont you JUST HATE CARDS SOMETIMES. Man the Truth hurts. The cards just bitch slapped me in the face. Say your sorry!!! Its not me its you!!! Okay okay okay fine. I do feel unjustly treated. You have no idea how much I have given in order to learn how to read these cards... but I forget how much I've gained. I just always want more... see I am just being ungrateful. I feel like Ralph Macchio and I do not understand what I am being taught. I am just pissed off and frustrated.

Blah. Friggin cards. Okay then. If that is the case, what am I missing? What do I not see?

Poseidon's Daughter: You have been given everything you need.

"You will be healed, when you finally fully embrace all that you are. For then, beautiful one, you will be in your true form, and have many abilities. You will be whole."

This card speaks of our own ability to hear, speak and communicate over vast distances and how we can understand the most complex matters... and when we sing our song,  the notes that resonate with us, all that is naturally ours is drawn to us and all that does not belong drops away forever.

From my Chakra deck I got these

Choice. Freewill~Courage~Willpower~Change
Heart Chakra
Solar Plexus Chakra

Well if this message wasn't any clearer.... Love is a choice. Just like the Lovers card I drew in my Celtic Cross spread. I do Hope and Fear for this. There are no words to describe how much this pings with me. I need to stop pussy footing around. I need to choose to focus on what I love and want and be done with it. I have both the passion and the power... and it's is my choice alone if I will fulfill my heart's desire.

You could take this as deeply as you want. Issues of feeling deserving. Injuries to the Solar Plexus that caused loss of power... but in the end... there is always a choice.





And for no reason I pulled some cards from my Lenormand. Tree~Lilies~Mountain~Fish~Flowers

The Tree shows me how we have taken root with our family. Security in life. Lilies-Family... blooming buds. We have rooted and now we are blooming. Stupid mountain has to put itself right in between all of that and the Fish. Fish is about money. Story of my life. I swear everytime I pull cards from this deck it seems so debbie downer. But it seems like this blockage is smack dab between my home and fmaily life and my prosperity and happiness.

What is this blockage? I will ask my Ancestral Path Tarot. I will draw three. What is the blockage? What can I do to move through it? Why is it there and what can I learn from this?

Of course. The Magician. You've created the family, the home... what makes you think you cant create the abundance!!!

Three of Swords: Sorrow of seperation. A temporary seperation to mature or gain perspective. Weaning from a deep attachment or addictive dependency. The releasing of expectations about other people; letting others make their own way in the world.

I suppose this blockage is a blessing in disguise... This is true though... a seperation to gain perspective and maturity.

Nine of Cups: Community celebration; public events; fellowship/sistership; joining a group opf people who share similar interests and/or values.

Promise ; P